


Truly

by ohohpierre



Category: Les Misérables (2012), Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: First Kiss, I tried angst, M/M, ambiguous era
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-10
Updated: 2016-05-10
Packaged: 2018-06-07 12:28:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,145
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6804040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohohpierre/pseuds/ohohpierre
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Imagine that Grantaire just sang/monologued his "Drink with Me" verse. Got the idea for this from the idea that Grantaire gives up, and just tells Enjolras because there's nothing else he could do. I tried.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Truly

The silence in the back room was held with bated breath as Enjolras and Grantaire stood and stared at each other. This was not an uncommon situation to be seem in the Musain, and especially familiar between the two gentlemen. Jehan noted to those around them that something was different this time. They took note of the lack of color to Grantaire's cheeks, and the flourish of color of Enjolras'.

_"He's sober."_

Grantaire inclined his head towards the statement, but neither refuted or accepted the assumption. His fists were clenching and unclenching, itching for the weight of a bottle in his hand that would give him the confidence to storm from the room. How he wished he had stopped at the bar.

_"Grantaire-_ " Enjolras reached out in the hopes to offer comfort, but Grantaire recoiled from his grip.

_"Get away from me."_ He turned to find that truly, everyone had their eyes on the dispute before them, and a tremor of anxiety ran through him. The little burst of confidence that had enabled to speak trickled away, and he rubbed at his mouth. He nervously ran a hand through hair, further messing up the tangle of curls that were now starting to stick to his forehead.

_"You can't just say something like that and expect the rest of us to just sit and take it."_ Enjolras didn't reach out again, but he took a step closer, to which Grantaire stepped back another. Enjolras sighed, and stepped back again as well. _"I don't see what the problem is- "_

Grantaire stopped himself from speaking, composing himself, his hands clenching once more.

_"It's over. You need only to look around you. The revolution that you so desperately desire is hardly a fire. It's a flame burning away at the wick of a candle until there's nothing left. The National Guard are no doubt preparing for another strike. Can't you look past the optimism of a new world and see the shitty one underneath that's trying to kill us all?"_

_"Then why say anything? You don't believe in any of this! You don't believe in me or the revolution. You seem to only be here to try to tear it all down. What is the point of you?"_

_"Enjolras- "_ Combeferre's voice found its way into the mix, but was abruptly silenced with a glare from Enjolras. He looked back at Grantaire, his stare prompting him to continue.

_"If you die, then I die too."_

_"Isn't that the whole point of this?"_

_"You don't understand, if_ you _die, then_ I _die too."_

_"What does that even mean- "_ Enjolras began, but stopped once he realized that the room slowly clearing. Grantaire only found his anxiety racing. A trailing hand from Jehan as they passed on their way out the door helped to ground him, and if only for a moment, he didn't feel as if he were flying away.

Enjolras still stood before him, Grantaire grumbling that he should have just left with others and spare him the pain. Enjolras crossed his arms over his chest.

_"What's this about?"_ Grantaire, for once stayed silence, opting to play with the fringe of his shirt rather than respond or make eye contact. When Grantaire didn't speak, he contined. _"What did you make all this fuss for? Are you truly good for nothing?"_

Grantaire took another step back.

_"I'm tired of waiting. Of waiting for you to realized, of waiting for the pain of it all."_ How could he loved someone who loathed him?

_"What are you talking about?"_  Enjolras was frustrated, Grantaire could tell, " _I don't understand, will you just come out and say it?"_

Grantaire took a moment to look at the man before him. He stood tall, but there was anger in his eyes, anger directed at him. This wasn't the time for him to stand and admire, and tonight, he didn't want to, not with Enjolras glaring at him with all his righteous fury. Instead, he stepped forward, closing the space between him and Enjolras.

_"If only you had realized prior to tonight,"_   he said quietly, and before Enjolras could argue, Grantaire pressed his lips to Enjolras'. He knew how much he wanted, but he knew that Enjolras wouldn't, and he pulled away all to quickly. He couldn't look at him now. He couldn't. " _I wish-"_

_"Grantaire,"_   He kept his gaze to the ground, and before long, Enjolras' feet came into view, _"Look at me."_ He reached out, and tipped up Grantaire's chin so that they could finally see face to face. He exhaled as Enjolras kissed him, a desperate escaping one of their throats, and it took Grantaire a moment to realize that it wasn't him who had made it. He felt as though he could cry when Enjolras' hand found his way to his hair, and Grantaire moved his own hands to Enjolras' torso, pulling him closer. He's is surprised to find Enjolras' lips cold, expecting heat that would match his passion of revolution. He parts his lips, Enjolras immediately licking into his mouth as the moved against each other, Grantaire holding on for as long as Enjolras allows, and Enjolras desperately gripping back.

They part to breath, and neither take the time to smile. Grantaire takes a breath, Enjolras following his lead before they press together again, Enjolras pulling at Grantaire's clothes for some kind of grip. Grantaire moves his hands to Enjolras' hips, holding him steady as they push and pull against each other, giving and taking. Enjolras hums, and pulls away, Grantaire keeping his eyes closed. He can feel it coming.

Enjolras moves his hands to Grantaire's face, his fingers brushing gently over his eyelids, his cheekbones, his lips. Enjolras leans in and places an open mouthed kiss against his jaw, and Grantaire feels his knees shake. He doesn't think about anything else except where Enjolras is touching him.

He can feel it coming.

Before long, Enjolras drops his hands and takes a small step back from Grantaire, who continues to keep his eyes closed.

_"I could have loved you. Truly, I could have."_

_"You couldn't have. The pull to revolution is too strong for you to withstand."_

_"Even so- "_

_"Your disdain for me would only grow."_ Grantaire waits for something else, something to alleviate the pain in his chest, but all he is met with is the sound of footsteps and an empty room when he opens his eyes, Enjolras' _"'Even so-'"_   stuck in the air between them. 

He moves to the bar, a bottle of wine finally making itself at home in Grantaire's hand.

This is all he would have. He raised the bottle to his lips, welcoming the drink, and found his place at an empty table in the back of the cafe, one hand on his mouth and the other holding his bottle.

And Grantaire, knowing himself selfish, was not satisfied.

**Author's Note:**

> ~you can find me over at jecroisentoii.tumblr.com


End file.
